察Giving and favors
What others want and feel
Say what you want someone to do with ~てほしい, and describe what others feel, from what they show, with ~がる.
Wanting someone to do it
~てほしい
I want my friend to come.
The person takes に.
I don't want you to come here.
Negative: ないで.
In use
With others
I want my kids to read more books.
I'd like you to help me a bit.
Softened with んだけど.
With someone above you
Switch to ~ていただきたい
I'd like my teacher to teach me.
~てほしい isn't used about someone of higher status.
I'd like Tanaka to come.
~てもらいたい means the same as ~てほしい.
Others' feelings
From my feelings to what's shown
I'm afraid of dogs.
You know your own feelings.
My younger sister is afraid of dogs.
For others, describe what they show. The particle changes to を.
Common ones
Adjectives that take ~がる
Drop the い, or use a な adjective's stem, and add がる. It conjugates like 買う.
| Adjective | With ~がる | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| ほしい | ほしがる | show one wants |
| ~たい | ~たがる | show one wants to |
| こわい | こわがる | be scared |
| さびしい | さびしがる | be lonely |
| いたい | いたがる | be in pain |
| さむい | さむがる | be cold |
| いやだ | いやがる | hate |
In use
~がる
My younger brother wants a new game.
My child doesn't want to go to school.
He gets lonely when night comes.
Two more
Wanting favors, and being that type
My sister wants our father to come and pick her up.
~てほしい can't describe someone else's wish, so use もらいたがっている.
My husband feels the cold easily.
~がり, or ~がり屋, names a person who's always like that.
When not to use it
When you can skip ~がる
You don't need ~がる in the past (彼女はこわかったそうです), when reporting what someone said, or inside a clause. It's for things you see now. It can also sound childish or critical when said of adults, so use it carefully.
Check yourself
Whose feeling is it?
Your turn
が or を?
I want a watch.
Say it yourself
Family trip
You're planning a trip. You want your brother to come. Your son wants to go to the sea, and your daughter is scared of the water.
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